Thursday, February 18, 2010
Friday, October 30, 2009
relieving critical mass in annoying facebook memes
25 random thoughts and things about me to never be seen by anyone i know, removed from facebook to not embarrass anyone.
i was in an expressive mood. i think i have to tag 25 people including all the people who have tagged me before in this crap. I'll get on that later.
1) i suspect that the random release of unconscious thought and energy will yield profound and likely terrifying concepts and energy
2) i've hated georgia tech, i've loved georgia tech, and now I hate it again. i'm moving on.
3) i want to drop out but at this point it makes no sense.
4) i'm leaving town for an indefinite amount of time starting on an indefinite date.
5) i love so many people, it's the sorrow of losing or not being loved in return that creates such an aggressive and hostile personality.
6) i have a soul mate.
7) i would torture, murder, and desecrate anything that came between me and what i love with no regard for myself, the government, or god.
8) no fucking mercy
9) eating unhealthy food is my form of slow and deliberate suicide. lucky buddha tonight.
10) people are not actually sheep, like we all like to say. some people actually let themselves be happy, and do their best to hold onto that ideal until it requires violent, aggressive ties to a clearly idiotic ideology.
11) religious groups' stands against unsavory art forms stem from the delusion that everyone can be happy within these structured, repressed, and ideological communities. trying to combat violent media eliminates the expressive opportunities of those who cannot find peace within that structure and will create decidedly more violent and dangerous individuals who have no way to express themselves whatsoever, and once their rage boils over they will be left standing in the blood of all who force fed doctrine and prayer instead a loving but tempered indulgence into their own personal darkness.
12) perhaps the escalating fight over censorship alleviates it's own fears of such evil emerging in society. the demonization of each polar subset provides the fight needed to satisfy each side's unfulfilled unconscious rage before it becomes any worse. perhaps the constant bickering of a political war of attrition is how to have a better life for our citizens by giving them both heroes and villains.
13) the more breakthroughs we reach in medical science are simply further opportunities to solidify a two class system with advanced health care and education on one side and shit-covered labor on the other. personalized genetic therapy treatments and long life extensions will only be for the rich as we may even split into two species of man based upon availability and reliance upon health care
14) it should not be expensive to posses and surround oneself with beauty.
15) this world can be beautiful
16) my dad wants me to get a haircut. he's wanted this for years now.
17) I will never be satisfied by a job that doesn't actively challenge me and demand an emotional connection to the project in an effort to create greatness. everything I've done professionally has only served to indulge the clearly destructive design choices of clients who have no idea the mess they're asking me to create for them.
18) i keep saying that education is a con, but I only feel that way because I've downed a few semesters worth of money on freshman level mandatory classes that are genuinely wasting my time right now.
19) I've heard people describe bogost's intro to cm class as a waste of time, or at least parts of it. whoever feels this way possesses an incredibly shallow mind that is unwilling to expand their professional talents and unable to demand themselves to reach for potential genius. It was the most rewarding experience I've had at georgia tech and the best work i had ever created at the time.
20) i am only happy when I'm creating
21) sometimes singing is the only way to get me out of depression. the problem is that i become too depressed to sing. if the right song starts playing, that usually opens me up.
22) an unfulfilled life is meaningless.
23) i have thought of suicide.
24) i hate casual sex. i hate the animal necessity of it at odds with the psychological embarrassment of it. i hate the experience of self loathing from bonding with people who don't speak to my soul, and i hate the unruly child i become when unable to have that kind of connection. I've never connected emotionally with someone i had sex with before knowing them for a long time. i've also never had sex with someone i knew for a long time beforehand, so perhaps you see the dilemma.
25) i am happy sometimes, despite how i may appear. i want to make my friends happy too. i'm sorry i've brought you all down. i just don't feel connected to people here anymore, and will probably go awol sometime soon for some duration once i figure out a place to crash. i love you guys and want desperately to love more. i miss you in ways you can't imagine. i could really use a hug, and am ready to embrace a more tender side than i've put on in recent years. make sure you feel alive. if you have a warrior's spirit, do battle. if you have an artists' soul, create beauty. and if you have a lovers heart, then take in all the pain around you and shelter the dying child within under your nurturing blanket of devotion and caring. then watch as all the blood-lusting, writer's blocked, and jealous masses wage war in a battle royal of frustrated and unfulfilled lives until the smoke clears and we return to a steady harmony of creation and destruction, ready again to love until the hurt rejoins us.
i was in an expressive mood. i think i have to tag 25 people including all the people who have tagged me before in this crap. I'll get on that later.
1) i suspect that the random release of unconscious thought and energy will yield profound and likely terrifying concepts and energy
2) i've hated georgia tech, i've loved georgia tech, and now I hate it again. i'm moving on.
3) i want to drop out but at this point it makes no sense.
4) i'm leaving town for an indefinite amount of time starting on an indefinite date.
5) i love so many people, it's the sorrow of losing or not being loved in return that creates such an aggressive and hostile personality.
6) i have a soul mate.
7) i would torture, murder, and desecrate anything that came between me and what i love with no regard for myself, the government, or god.
8) no fucking mercy
9) eating unhealthy food is my form of slow and deliberate suicide. lucky buddha tonight.
10) people are not actually sheep, like we all like to say. some people actually let themselves be happy, and do their best to hold onto that ideal until it requires violent, aggressive ties to a clearly idiotic ideology.
11) religious groups' stands against unsavory art forms stem from the delusion that everyone can be happy within these structured, repressed, and ideological communities. trying to combat violent media eliminates the expressive opportunities of those who cannot find peace within that structure and will create decidedly more violent and dangerous individuals who have no way to express themselves whatsoever, and once their rage boils over they will be left standing in the blood of all who force fed doctrine and prayer instead a loving but tempered indulgence into their own personal darkness.
12) perhaps the escalating fight over censorship alleviates it's own fears of such evil emerging in society. the demonization of each polar subset provides the fight needed to satisfy each side's unfulfilled unconscious rage before it becomes any worse. perhaps the constant bickering of a political war of attrition is how to have a better life for our citizens by giving them both heroes and villains.
13) the more breakthroughs we reach in medical science are simply further opportunities to solidify a two class system with advanced health care and education on one side and shit-covered labor on the other. personalized genetic therapy treatments and long life extensions will only be for the rich as we may even split into two species of man based upon availability and reliance upon health care
14) it should not be expensive to posses and surround oneself with beauty.
15) this world can be beautiful
16) my dad wants me to get a haircut. he's wanted this for years now.
17) I will never be satisfied by a job that doesn't actively challenge me and demand an emotional connection to the project in an effort to create greatness. everything I've done professionally has only served to indulge the clearly destructive design choices of clients who have no idea the mess they're asking me to create for them.
18) i keep saying that education is a con, but I only feel that way because I've downed a few semesters worth of money on freshman level mandatory classes that are genuinely wasting my time right now.
19) I've heard people describe bogost's intro to cm class as a waste of time, or at least parts of it. whoever feels this way possesses an incredibly shallow mind that is unwilling to expand their professional talents and unable to demand themselves to reach for potential genius. It was the most rewarding experience I've had at georgia tech and the best work i had ever created at the time.
20) i am only happy when I'm creating
21) sometimes singing is the only way to get me out of depression. the problem is that i become too depressed to sing. if the right song starts playing, that usually opens me up.
22) an unfulfilled life is meaningless.
23) i have thought of suicide.
24) i hate casual sex. i hate the animal necessity of it at odds with the psychological embarrassment of it. i hate the experience of self loathing from bonding with people who don't speak to my soul, and i hate the unruly child i become when unable to have that kind of connection. I've never connected emotionally with someone i had sex with before knowing them for a long time. i've also never had sex with someone i knew for a long time beforehand, so perhaps you see the dilemma.
25) i am happy sometimes, despite how i may appear. i want to make my friends happy too. i'm sorry i've brought you all down. i just don't feel connected to people here anymore, and will probably go awol sometime soon for some duration once i figure out a place to crash. i love you guys and want desperately to love more. i miss you in ways you can't imagine. i could really use a hug, and am ready to embrace a more tender side than i've put on in recent years. make sure you feel alive. if you have a warrior's spirit, do battle. if you have an artists' soul, create beauty. and if you have a lovers heart, then take in all the pain around you and shelter the dying child within under your nurturing blanket of devotion and caring. then watch as all the blood-lusting, writer's blocked, and jealous masses wage war in a battle royal of frustrated and unfulfilled lives until the smoke clears and we return to a steady harmony of creation and destruction, ready again to love until the hurt rejoins us.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
musician
It was a surprise birthday party to which i had gotten a text message invite from an old hookup who probably preferred that I didn't attend, but did want me to forward the message to all the rugby people who had made friends with her (the birthday girl, not the hookup) when she was running circles over the competition instead of getting high all the time. Regardless, I arrived anyway, with none of my brethren to accompany me, meandering awkwardly through this menagerie of unfamiliar faces. To be fair, the party was hosted at a local brewery who had some excellent local beers on tap. I still frequent the place during tours, everyone go to the Atlanta Brewing Company Fridays at 6 and enjoy the tasting.
But I digress.
Many beers, slices of pizza, and a local band's set into the evening, and I was ready to start gaining the acquaintance of these strangers. It wasn't long until I came across one woman standing with a male friend in the brewing area smoking a cigarette. She wore a tight, blue work shirt that may have said "carl" on a name patch for a mechanics shop, several piercings in her face, and a tattoo of a piano keyboard that stretched around her wrist until the keys neared her inner arm and broke off and tumbled up towards her elbow. Her curly, dark hair was a superfluous footnote of attraction on an already inspiring individual, and I was drunk enough to make a first move.
I approached empty minded but somehow asked casually, "Excuse me, are you a musician?"
"What, you couldn't tell from the fucking tattoo?"
"No, I was just overwhelmed by the total presence of rock aura emanating from your pores."
I looked confidently into her eyes as she stood bewildered, not sure how to take what I'd just thrown at her, but clearly interested at prodding further at my conversational quirks. I forget what immediately followed, but conversation ensued with her and her friend until someone mentioned french campaign. Of course I had to interrupt...
"Or as we learned from Christopher Walken in Wayne's World 2, all champagne is from France. Anything else is simply sparkling white wine."
To this she lost control, and cracking up claimed that she was the biggest Wayne's World nerd of all, and admitted to owning the board game (which may actually be a drinking game, I'm unsure).
I moved on and a friend arrived, someone who'd never met the birthday girl ironically, but still it was good to see someone familiar. After more drinks and drunken conversation, the band played another set (one member of which turned out to be the musician's little brother).
I see her again in the crowd, approach, and gesture a greeting towards her, which she returns in kind. This somehow erupts into a pantomime exchange of intense rock stage poses, the antithesis of which includes a raised arm of triumph post air-strumming and hand bang above a wide rock-stance, rotating before others who may view such immense posture. After laughing profoundly she yells in my ear "you have to play, what instrument?" i told her that I sang, but am learning guitar.
The party continued as usual, there was further conversation and we exchanged numbers, and things seemed to be going amazingly well. Her male friend was eager to put on a show to raise money for alternative energy sources and was interested in getting some contacts in the science world (I go to Georgia Tech) for the proceeds. They definitely were not together.
A long game of phone tag proceeds between voicemail and texts until finally we speak again on the phone. I mentioned "more is in the inbox than the outbox... to make a metaphor to an office job that is life" (now that i have an office job, it seems more and more relevant) and we have a great conversation and mention coming parties to eachother.
Still, despite the "maybe" plans and commitments, I never saw her again. I learned later that the girl was bisexual and had a girlfriend at the time i met her, which could explain a lot. Despite it all, she took my heart that day. It's too bad we couldn't explore that relationship further, even just as friends.
But I digress.
Many beers, slices of pizza, and a local band's set into the evening, and I was ready to start gaining the acquaintance of these strangers. It wasn't long until I came across one woman standing with a male friend in the brewing area smoking a cigarette. She wore a tight, blue work shirt that may have said "carl" on a name patch for a mechanics shop, several piercings in her face, and a tattoo of a piano keyboard that stretched around her wrist until the keys neared her inner arm and broke off and tumbled up towards her elbow. Her curly, dark hair was a superfluous footnote of attraction on an already inspiring individual, and I was drunk enough to make a first move.
I approached empty minded but somehow asked casually, "Excuse me, are you a musician?"
"What, you couldn't tell from the fucking tattoo?"
"No, I was just overwhelmed by the total presence of rock aura emanating from your pores."
I looked confidently into her eyes as she stood bewildered, not sure how to take what I'd just thrown at her, but clearly interested at prodding further at my conversational quirks. I forget what immediately followed, but conversation ensued with her and her friend until someone mentioned french campaign. Of course I had to interrupt...
"Or as we learned from Christopher Walken in Wayne's World 2, all champagne is from France. Anything else is simply sparkling white wine."
To this she lost control, and cracking up claimed that she was the biggest Wayne's World nerd of all, and admitted to owning the board game (which may actually be a drinking game, I'm unsure).
I moved on and a friend arrived, someone who'd never met the birthday girl ironically, but still it was good to see someone familiar. After more drinks and drunken conversation, the band played another set (one member of which turned out to be the musician's little brother).
I see her again in the crowd, approach, and gesture a greeting towards her, which she returns in kind. This somehow erupts into a pantomime exchange of intense rock stage poses, the antithesis of which includes a raised arm of triumph post air-strumming and hand bang above a wide rock-stance, rotating before others who may view such immense posture. After laughing profoundly she yells in my ear "you have to play, what instrument?" i told her that I sang, but am learning guitar.
The party continued as usual, there was further conversation and we exchanged numbers, and things seemed to be going amazingly well. Her male friend was eager to put on a show to raise money for alternative energy sources and was interested in getting some contacts in the science world (I go to Georgia Tech) for the proceeds. They definitely were not together.
A long game of phone tag proceeds between voicemail and texts until finally we speak again on the phone. I mentioned "more is in the inbox than the outbox... to make a metaphor to an office job that is life" (now that i have an office job, it seems more and more relevant) and we have a great conversation and mention coming parties to eachother.
Still, despite the "maybe" plans and commitments, I never saw her again. I learned later that the girl was bisexual and had a girlfriend at the time i met her, which could explain a lot. Despite it all, she took my heart that day. It's too bad we couldn't explore that relationship further, even just as friends.
Startup
Hello world.
This blog is about pickup lines.
Epic ones (or so i believed at the time).
Ones thought up on the fly.
Some may have yielded initial success,
but all of which lead to total rejection.
Enjoy.
This blog is about pickup lines.
Epic ones (or so i believed at the time).
Ones thought up on the fly.
Some may have yielded initial success,
but all of which lead to total rejection.
Enjoy.
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